Making Bedtime Fun: Creative Choice-Based Bedtime Routines for Toddlers

Making Bedtime Fun: Creative Choice-Based Bedtime Routines for Toddlers

As a parent, you understand the delicate balance between guiding your toddler and fostering their independence.

Bedtime can be a particularly challenging time to strike this balance, especially when your little one has shown bedtime resistance by coming up with clever delay tactics.

Yet, with gentle and responsive approaches, it's possible to create a bedtime routine that not only helps your child feel happy about going to bed but also empowers them by offering choices.

Incorporating playful options into your toddler's bedtime routine can transform what might be a stressful time into an opportunity for connection and growth.

Below are five ways you can include your toddler in their bedtime routine, allowing them to practice autonomy while feeling in control within the limits you set.

1. Choosing Pajamas: Comfort Meets Fun

Getting dressed for bed is often one of the first steps in the bedtime routine. Why not turn this mundane task into an exciting choice?

• Offer Two Options: Lay out two sets of pajamas and ask, Would you like to wear the blue ones with stars or the red ones with dinosaurs? This gives your toddler a sense of control while keeping the decision manageable.

• Make it a Game: Turn choosing pajamas into a fun game by pretending they are selecting costumes for a nighttime adventure. You could say, “Are we going on a space mission tonight or exploring the jungle?”

• Eeny Meeny Miny Moe: My youngest daughter naturally uses this cute way to decide what she wants when she’s presented with 2-3 choices. Keeping the options to two for toddlers makes decision-making much easier, in my experience.
  

By giving them control over what they wear, you're helping them feel more invested in the process.

2. Brushing Teeth: Racing to Who Gets to Be Clean First

Toothbrushing can sometimes be met with resistance. Perhaps your toddler is experiencing feelings of pent-up powerlessness, frustration, or fear. Using force or threats will make him or her feel worse and uncooperative.

Here are some games you could play to reverse that:

• Race to the Bathroom: Ask, “Would you like me to carry you or should we race to brush our teeth?”

• The ‘Silly Toothbrush’ game, where you pretend that you don’t know where their teeth are. You might say something like, “Oh I know where your teeth are!” and try to brush your child’s arm. They will probably keep trying to show you where their teeth are, and you can keep on pretending to be confused about where their teeth are, brushing all different parts of your body, saying things like, “Oh, your teeth are very furry today” (when brushing their hair with the toothbrush.)

• Pretend to keep finding tiny animals in their mouth. “I wonder what animals we can find between your teeth today.” You may also add animal sounds and act surprised when you find them.

These playful ways can bring on connection and healing laughter!

3. Playing Before Sleep

Right before your toddler’s bedtime, there is a time of wakefulness and alertness. This often lasts about 1-2 hours. It’s called the ‘wake maintenance zone’ (WMZ). You will notice a spike of playfulness and hyperactivity during this time.

This is NOT overtiredness. This is a natural time of alertness based on your toddler’s body clock and it will be difficult to fall asleep during this time.

The best way to manage this? Wait for it to pass or even better, play rough housing or sushi roll with a blanket to get more energy out of their system.

Not only will they use up the leftover energy but they also get to fill up their love tank from the playful connection.

I can reassure you that bedtime will become easy within 5-10 minutes after the WMZ passes.

If you have a toddler who wants to play for hours, then you must set boundaries lovingly, and then listen to the feelings that the connection from playing has helped bubble up to the surface.

4. Gentle Transition Activities: From Play to Rest

Transitioning from playtime to bedtime can be tricky for toddlers who are full of energy.

I like to propose to parents to use story time as a way to transition and turn that high energy down for relaxation.

Again, pick 5 books and let your child choose 2-3 to read for that night. If they want more, I leave that to your judgment on how to set boundaries around this as I’m familiar that book reading can turn into delay tactics to avoid sleep.

However, if your toddler is included in every step of the bedtime routine where he or she is highly influencing the outcome, by the time story time comes around, they’re more than happy to cooperate with the limits you’ve set.

5. Lovey Preferences: Comforting Choices

Loveys or their favorite toys are powerful comfort items and a strong cue for sleep. Incorporating choice into this aspect of their routine can also be beneficial.

Some toddlers have more than one lovey and that’s okay. They might have a primary one, and another one or two extra comfort items that they like to rotate based on their choice.

You could let them choose these comfort items before they get into bed. And once they're in bed, and the lights are switched off, no more swapping or making endless requests for other loveys.

One other comfort item that’s more to create a safe and soothing environment is the usage of night light. 3-6 year olds tend to be afraid of the dark as their imagination has evolved by this age. Having a night light (warm coloured red or orange tone) can be helpful for them to feel secure going to sleep.

While none of these ideas are quick fixes, over time they will strengthen the connection between you and your child.

Empowering your toddler with choices during their bedtime routine not only promotes autonomy but also makes them feel heard and valued.

The key is to balance structure and flexibility. That means you wanna maintain consistency in routines while allowing room for choice according to your child’s mood for the day.

By integrating playful elements into tasks like dressing, brushing teeth, reading stories, transitioning from playtime, and comfort items, you create an environment where bedtime is seen as an engaging journey where your child can be actively involved.

Remember, each family is unique; adapt these suggestions based on what resonates most with your child’s personality and needs.

Connection and choice-based bedtime routines are magic!

Are you a co-sleeping family navigating the journey of toddler sleep and ready to move towards independent sleep for your toddler?

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